something naive not quite dead

the event was huge and i was enjoying myself, but i had found a small perch above the chaos and felt happy to be quiet and simply watching for a few moments. i scanned the hall and looked over all the fine details of the room. i was glad for paul and sara that the played out 'steam punk' element i had tried to talk them out of was working beautifully (just enough to be ironic). i didn't realize i was smiling until my eyes met with the grinning face of a very tall, bearded man standing still in the center of the floor. when i realized he'd been watching me, i laughed- which set him laughing and soon the shared laughter was the helpless kind. i let myself fall into that laughter until i was holding my sides. as i wiped the tears from my face, he gestured for me to come down. well then, right. i climbed down and made my way toward him. as i drew closer to him, the joy began to move into something more profound. it was as though on some level i began to recognize him and with every step become more aware of what the absence of him in my life had meant. by the time we were within arms reach, we shared a tender melancholy. he drew me in and picked me up with a warm, familiar embrace that seemed to last forever. i closed my eyes and let my head rest upon his shoulder like a child.