the jon and kate

we were setting up to shoot at their mansion and it was huge. everybody kept making snide comments about the obscene amount of money the thing had cost and i was totally on board with that until i started to wander around the house. everything was designed and built with children in mind. every nook, every bookshelf, play area and bathroom. soon the jon and kate machine showed up and started going through hair/mu/wardrobe. jon was wandering around the grounds showing the poor PA's all his hoaky art projects that he was convinced were genius, talked endlessly about his imagined accomplishments and generally made himself impossible to corral. kate was cooperative and quietly cheerful. she had brought her latest spawn; a preemie that was somehow able to say some words and understand enough to behave. kate sat quietly through her prep and then stood around unobtrusively waiting for direction. if there was a question about arranging the furniture or whatever she jumped right in and helped move it. she let everyone hold the baby and was not precious about it at all. jon insisted upon wearing his hardy gear even though the company had refused clearance for it because they said he had ruined the brand. later i found myself standing next to kate. she told me they were losing the house. i felt sorry for her. someone whispered in my ear that jon's penis was 3 inches long. i said well, that explains why he's such a douche.